Blithe Years

An undersized,green alarm clock-turned into a picture frame is displayed at a corner.And I'm keenly staring at the faces of the people in the picture.I picked it up and I noticed the beaming visage of a little girl with a silly haircut,in a yellow sando and short comfy shorts.Oh,how I feel the enjoyment that she was going through at that moment!Her face just shows absolute glee and contentment.It's a countenance that is oblivious of qualms,criticisms and self-consciousness.It seems like all she cared about was herself and the pleasure that she was having.As I slowly place the picture frame back,I am grinning but at the same time feeling such terrible nostalgia as I say,'Hey,I so miss you'.

I yearn for thee

Oh,happy thoughts
Where art thou?
I profoundly ache for thee now.
Come and battle these doldrums away.

Oh,happy thoughts
Where art thou?
I am in such a racking phase.
The nights are making it even worse.

Oh,happy thoughts
Where art thou?
Rescue my agonizing soul.
And thou shalt not depart.

'PATAWAAAD!'

I am currently watching the green curtains in my bedroom grooving with the cold wind.Christmas is really in the air.We are already done with decorating the Christmas Tree and so with the display of Christmas lights outside the house.But something is still lacking.What is it?Carolers.I still haven't heard the sometimes annoying voices of kids singing 'Jingol bells,jingol bells,jingol all the way.Oh,what fun the restaurant...'. I'm really wondering what happened to the children who caroled every night in our house last year.Did they suddenly grow up into bashful,awkward teenagers?But wait,I can hear the sound of cans being hit by a stick from a distance.And the small,out-of-tune voices of kids.But they seem so distant.Maybe they're not going to carol in our neighborhood tonight.Oh,well,my mother would be relieved.Still,it's so fun to hear them sing 'Thank you,thank you,Ang babarat ninyo,thank you!' when someone shouts at them 'PATAWAAAD!!!'.Just then,I hear the excited footsteps of the children going into our house's direction.But before they can even start their ' Sa may bahay...',our neighbors' dogs bark at them.They are so scared that they hurriedly run away,away from the dogs who seem so aggravated at Christmas carolers.

Codswallop?

Naive sighs,
Through the moving walls I hearken
Blabbering balderdash,
Anything but decipherable to my ears.

Breaking frozen memories,
This and more my mind endures.
A striking twinge encircles my heart
I long to snatch and haul it into the swamp.

Powerpoint Moments

He wears a green-and-white striped polo shirt today.It looks awfully good on him.He then cracks a warm smile,showing his white teeth.And I can't refrain myself from grinning like a fool.While he talks like there's no tomorrow,he throws me a brief glance.Little did he know that I'm not entirely listening to his blabbers.I am rather staring intently at his face.He's not really handsome.He's not even the kind of guy you'll abruptly notice in a crowd.But there's just something about him that is hugely attractive and interesting.He's conspicuously brainy but not in an intimidating way.I instinctively look away every time he glances at me because I am so guilty of finding him cute.Then a friend of mine taps me on the shoulder and whispers that she'll secretly take a picture of him.I laugh.She's being silly again.Too bad,I guess he sees her slowly raising her new cell phone in his direction.Bummer.But he doesn't say anything.I bet he's used to it.Then another friend nudges me.And my 'concentration' is ruined.Oh,the bell is ringing.That's okay,I'll see him again next week.I give him another look as my classmates hurriedly go out of the room and other students hurry to the opposite side where they'll also surely spend time staring with a great awe at him.

(This is not a 'crush crush' thing,mind you.)

State of Nothingness

I've been staring at the continuously blinking cursor for an hour now.And yet I still have no idea what to write.What the heck.When I get a barrel of kept-ideas and feelings,blogging seems miles away.But when I have all the day to post whatever I desire,words irritatingly fail me.I guess it's another reminder that life can sometimes be wickedly ironic.(To be continued...Hahaha.)

Regrets

I guess it can never go away. This feeling. This feeling of discontent. The more I try to feel like I belong, the stronger the forces push me away. It pains to see that I'm enduring just because I never had the courage to stand up for myself and grab what I really wanted in the first place. It's getting more and more baffling the moment my classes are starting and the time when I spend alone, profoundly pondering on the time and chances wasted. I had the choice but I let myself watch it slowly fall into minuscule pieces, pieces which I am certain can never be gathered by my frail, little hands.What an inane action I've committed. Tsk.